For instance, if your ex cheated you may be less certain about never giving your cheating ex a second chance. Faced with softer, more forgiving feelings and a cheating ex who desperately wants you back, what should you do?

If you cheated on your ex, finding sympathetic advice can be difficult too. After all, you’re the “villain.” But you would do anything to turn back the clock – to get a second chance. The question is, how?

Our articles below focus on getting back with an ex after cheating – on giving and getting a second chance. You may find it helpful to read both sides of the story, to help you understand what your ex is going through.

If YOUR EX cheated …

Getting Back With a Cheating Ex – Get Balanced Advice
Why hard-line advice about getting back together with a cheating ex is not necessarily helpful and needs to be balanced by other views.

Should You Give a Cheating Ex a Second Chance?
Practical advice to help you decide if you should give your cheating ex a second chance or not.

If YOU cheated …

Can I Get My Ex Back After Cheating?
Your chances of getting a second chance and getting your ex back after cheating may not be as poor as you think.

How to Get Your Ex Back After You Cheated
Know how to get your ex back after you cheated – ten essential tips for getting an ex back after cheating.

Excuses Will Not Win Your Ex Back After Cheating
Why excuses are a poor strategy for getting back with your ex after cheating.

More advice on getting an ex back after cheating…

The process of getting an ex back after cheating is more challenging. To speed it up and make sure you do everything right (especially important after cheating) we highly recommend you check out complete step-by-step plans for getting an ex back. They will provide you with all the help you need to avoid mistakes and stay on track to getting your ex back.

See Books on How to Get Your Ex Back for more information, including our top picks.

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This hard-line “advice” smacks of lingering bitterness and resentment about the writer’s own experiences of a cheating ex. They have not been able to forgive but neither have they been able to forget.

They feel that all lovers who cheat should be kicked to the curb, permanently – that they should have no chance at all of getting back with their ex, period. This may echo the kind of of advice friends and family are giving you, especially if they were never fond of your ex.

Of course sometimes a cheating ex does deserve to be kicked to the curb, hard. But this kind of advice – that you should never give a cheating ex a second chance – is not helpful.

• It is a “no ifs and buts” solution to a problem riddled with ifs and buts, not the least of which are, “But what if I still love my ex?” and, “If I get back with my ex will they cheat again?”
• This cut-and-dry advice ignores the fact that many couples do get back together (and stay together very happily) after a partner has cheated.
• It forgets that giving a second chance applies not just to the cheating ex but to the relationship. And the fact is, some relationships do deserve a second chance.

To decide if your cheating ex deserves a second chance, you need to keep an open mind and not be drawn into a knee-jerk reaction to the fact that they have cheated. Whatever decision you reach it has to be one you can live with so that you can truly move on, with or without your ex. And to make a sound decision you need balanced advice.

So, take this kind of advice about a cheating ex with a pinch of salt. Read it, but also read more thoughtful and, importantly, more realistic advice on getting back with a cheating ex.

You can make a start with our article on giving a cheating ex a second chance – advice on when you should and should not
consider getting back with a cheating ex.

An original Cheating Advice article, exclusive to this site!
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• Honest about your ex and why they cheated.
• You also need to be honest about yourself and your relationship with your ex.

Let’s take these things one by one.

Your Ex and Why They Cheated

First of all, your ex has cheated but why did they cheat on you? This depends on what type of cheat they are.

There are two types of cheats – one-time cheats and serial cheats.

Deep down in your heart you most likely have a sense of which type of cheat your ex is. But, it’s very difficult to tune in to this when you are overwhelmed by anger, hurt and bitterness.

So, here’s a run down of the difference between serial cheats and one-time cheats, to help you get back in touch with the reality of the situation.

One-time Cheats

One-time cheats make a genuine mistake. They regret it. They hate themselves for the fact that they have cheated. They are frightened by what they have lost or nearly lost – the person they truly love.

Caught or not, they won’t do it again.

Serial Cheats

Serial cheats, on the other hand, intend to have their cake and eat it too. They are not particularly concerned about getting caught. They invest less heavily in relationships than their partners do and they believe their partner’s love will get them a second chance – if they are unlikely enough to get caught.

Bottom line? Serial cheats think they’re entitled to fool around, and always will.

Which Type of Cheat is Your Ex?

This is the big question and to answer it you need to be honest. This means you need to make a serious effort to put aside your anger, hurt and so on, and think realistically. You also need to any ignore tears, pleas, promises and other “signs” of guilt and remorse your ex may have shown. Serial cheats have practiced for the day – or should we say days – they get caught.

Ask yourself:

• Has your ex cheated in a former relationship?
• Have they cheated before in your relationship?
• Have you suspected them of cheating in the past – more than this one time you know about?
• Were there good solid reasons for your past suspicions?
• Were parts of their life always kept off-limits to you?

If “yes” to any or all of the above, you most likely should not get back with your ex – your ex is a serial cheat. You will soon be back to square one, asking yourself, Should I give my cheating ex a second chance? They don’t deserve a second chance, and you deserve better.

If this isn’t clear to you – or you are reluctant to accept it – then you need to ask yourself some more questions.

• Are you more afraid of being alone than being hurt again by your ex?
• Do you believe it is your fault that they cheated, and you need to change?
• Do you believe your ex will change “because they said so?”

These are not valid reasons to give a cheating ex a second chance. They are reasons to get help to feel good about yourself, recognize your own worth (which your ex doesn’t) and move on – without your ex.

If on the other hand your ex has been:

• Fully committed to your relationship
• Sharing and open about all aspects of their life
• Has never been unfaithful to a former partner
• Has never been unfaithful to you
• You never had the slightest reason to suspect your ex of cheating

… then you have good reason to believe your ex is a one-time cheat.

In this case, you should consider getting back with your ex even though they have cheated.

Accept the Possibility that Your Ex Deserves a Second Chance

There is never any excuse for cheating, which is why it is never your fault. But a genuine mistake accompanied by genuine remorse deserves at least a chance of forgiveness.

This may be very difficult to see but there is no clock ticking. You have all the time in the world to decide if you feel you should give your one-time cheating ex the second chance they desperately want.

You may find that one-time cheat or not, you can never forgive your ex  – it’s over. But you may also find that despite all you are feeling now, your relationship had enough value and substance that you are prepared to give it a second chance.

An original article on Giving a Cheating Ex a Second Chance, exclusive to this site!
Copyright © Get-Your-Lover-Back.com

The short answer is yes, you can – it is possible to get your ex back after cheating.

Although cheating is one of the worst “relationship crimes” many couples do survive and do get back together after cheating.

What’s more, most of us know of cases, personally or in the media, where a cheating ex did not even deserve a second chance (let alone a third or fourth) but got one all the same.

Yep, even serial cheats or first-time cheats with few redeeming qualities (most likely serial cheats in the making) and little in the way of genuine remorse somehow manage to get their ex back.

It’s not a good thing that those who should be kicked to the curb get more than they deserve. But for you, it is!

Think about it. If even totally undeserving cheats can get a second chance, there’s a very good chance for anyone (and I’m assuming this includes you!) who genuinely deserves one. Certainly you deserve and are more likely to win a fair hearing at least – a big first step toward getting your ex back.

Why Do You Deserve to Get Your Ex Back After Cheating?

When you’ve made a terrible mistake it can be tempting to accept the consequences even though you desperately want to turn back the clock, and be with your ex again.

It’s important to stay focused on repairing the situation rather than giving up. And an important part of this is to really believe that you really do deserve a second chance. Your belief and your determination will make a strong impression on your ex.

So why exactly do you deserve a second chance after cheating?

Well for one thing you have all the right feelings – a deep sense of loss, pain, self-hate and regret. These feelings are indicators that you are not a serial cheat but someone who did something really stupid – you made a terrible mistake. Your genuine regret and other emotions will show through and give credibility to what you say to your ex, giving you a vital edge in getting them back.

For another, despite making the mistake of your life by cheating, you are a worthwhile person with qualities that your ex has loved. You have done something really bad but the big picture of who you are is good. This is something that your ex will be aware of, once their initial emotions settle down.

What Next – How Do You Get Your Ex Back?

It probably goes without saying that getting an ex back after you’ve cheated won’t be a walk in the park.

For one thing, it will take longer than it would if you had broken up for the “usual” reasons.

For another, “how to get an ex back” and “how to get an ex back after cheating” are not quite the same thing! Some of the usual “do’s and don’ts” are more important than they would usually be when trying to get an an ex back.

For instance, it’s always important to give an ex space but absolutely essential when you have cheated. And while there are genuine excuses that can be made for certain faults and errors, excuses will not win your ex back after cheating – they will backfire.

Most of all, you can’t afford to put a foot wrong!

With this in mind, it’s a good idea to check out the best ebooks on how to get an ex back. These give you complete step-by-step plans to make it happen, and will steer you clear of nasty mistakes that will blow your chances. Break ups following cheating are typically far more emotionally charged – more likely to lead to behavior that only makes things worse.

One of the side benefits of getting a plan, or “ex back roadmap”, is that it will help you feel more positive about the future, and feeling positive is important.

Stay focused on the fact that you do deserve a second chance, and that if you do the right things you really can get your ex back after cheating.

An original article by Caroline Mackenzie, exclusive to this site!
Copyright © Get-Your-Lover-Back.com

For those of you who do need help, knowing how to get an ex back is one thing. Knowing how to get your ex back after you cheated is another.

Some of the key strategies for getting an ex back, whatever the reason for a break up, are especially important after cheating. Others should be avoided altogether – they will make your situation worse.

Here are the critical do’s and don’ts of how to get an ex back after you have cheated. Keep them in mind when reading advice aimed at all comers, to stay on the right track to getting your ex back.

1. Accept it may take a long time to get your ex back
Do the right things and you can get your ex back after you cheated but be prepared for it to take some time. You face a greater challenge than people who have broken up for more common reasons, such as an argument that got out of control.

2. Keep your distance
It is essential to give an ex space after breaking up. It is absolutely vital after cheating. However desperate you are to communicate, resist. For some time you will be the last person your ex wants any contact with. Respect this. Your ex knows how you feel and needs longer than usual to figure out how they feel.

3. Accept your punishment
Your ex has been deeply hurt (to say the least) and will want to hurt you back. The best way they know how is to make you feel that there is no chance you will ever get them back (even if there is). They may flirt with others, look better than ever. However they choose to punish you, avoid knee jerk reactions. Understand that your ex needs to make you suffer – it’s part of their healing process.

4. Be honest about how you feel
Part of the usual advice on how to get an ex back is, control your emotions. Sometimes it’s even a good idea to keep them guessing about your true feelings. If you have cheated, this is a dangerous strategy. It is important that your ex knows how you really feel. Don’t overdo it but don’t be tempted to act cool like losing your ex is no big deal. If asked, be honest about how much you regret cheating on your ex and want them back. Word gets around…

Need to say sorry to your ex … for Cheating? You face a bigger challenge than most to get your ex to forgive you.

Get the extra help you need with the Clean Slate Method – a formula for success when you apologize to your ex… even after you have cheated.

5. Understand what your ex feels
After you have cheated it is not enough to apologize for what you have done. Learn what it really feels like to be cheated on. Your ex will want evidence that you fully understand the impact of your cheating – what you have put them through. Your apology will mean little without it.

6. Behave yourself
To get your ex back after cheating you must be squeaky clean and play safe. No flirting, no one-night stands on the rebound. Risky but often recommended tactics like using jealousy to get your ex back are a big no-no. It must be obvious to everyone (spies included) that you are interested in one person only – your ex. Your self-control, even when you have opportunities to misbehave, will help convince your ex that you are unlikely to cheat again – absolutely critical to get them back. If you really can’t behave or want to go wild and forget your problems for a night, do it somewhere your ex isn’t likely to find out about it.

7. Be persistent
It’s pretty much guaranteed that your ex will prolong the break up long after they have decided (and perhaps hinted) that they are willing to at least think about getting back together. This is partly to prolong your punishment but it’s also a critical commitment test. Your persistence is the only reliable measure your ex has of how sorry you are and how much you want them back. Make sure you pass.

8. Do not make excuses for cheating
When you have contact with your ex don’t even think about making an excuse for cheating, however persuasive you think it is. An excuse will not earn forgiveness and will seriously provoke your ex. It implies a hope that they will understand and accept what you have done. They won’t. The key to forgiveness is not an excuse – it’s remorse.

9. Be romantic
Although a decent period of no contact with your ex is essential, at some point (but no earlier than a month or two after your break up) the time may be right for a romantic gesture or two. Do not overdo it. The purpose is simply to let your ex know that they are uppermost in your thoughts – that you love and miss them – with no explanations or expectations attached. Let the romance of the gesture – the flowers, poem, etc. – speak for itself.

10. Don’t despair
Remind yourself that the key to how to get your ex back after you have cheated is persistence. While there may seem to be no change – no encouraging signs at all – the longer you hang in there, the better your chances are becoming.

Finally, consider a step-by-step plan
Books on how to get your ex back – complete strategies – are particularly recommended if you have cheated. Not only do they provide detailed step-by-step guidance that will keep you on track – you can’t afford to make mistakes – the best books provide actual timelines too. Knowing exactly what you should be doing when can help you stay the course. And with a structured approach to getting your ex back, the end seems not only achievable but nearer in sight.

An original Tips to Get Your Ex Back article by Caroline Mackenzie, exclusive to this site!
Copyright © Get-Your-Lover-Back.com

There is no excuse for cheating. You have probably heard this many times and it’s easy to dismiss as angry ranting that doesn’t match up to reality. But the fact is, it’s true. Your ex knows it and, deep down, you probably know it too – cheating is inexcusable.

For instance, you can explain the chain of events that led up to your cheating – the temptations, emotions, etc. – but however persuasive these events were no one forced your hand. At some point you decided to cheat, even though you knew it was wrong.

Classic Excuses for Cheating

Of course many a cheating ex will give a kind of “temporary insanity” plea saying they lost their sense of right and wrong because they were drunk or high. Even in a court of law, let alone face-to-face with your ex, intoxication is not an excuse for cheating.

Drink and drugs certainly make people less inhibited – less shy, less fearful and so on – but they do not wipe out a person’s sense of right and wrong, or force people to do things they don’t want to do. Remember, your ex has most likely been intoxicated themselves at some time, and knows this very well.

Another classic excuse for cheating is that “it didn’t mean anything”. It may well be true but it is likely to seriously provoke your ex. The obvious response is, if it meant nothing, why did you do it? Why did you shatter everything your ex believed in – believed about you and your relationship – for nothing?

The bottom line is, all excuses for cheating are likely to anger your ex, and backfire.

Why Excuses for Cheating Backfire

Excuses are by definition an attempt to justify something in order to get forgiveness. This is fine when it comes to explaining why you were late for work but there are no valid excuses for cheating.

Therefore, any attempt to justify cheating not only insults your ex’s intelligence and common sense, it hints that you have tried to justify cheating to yourself – that you are sorry, “sort of“.

What’s more, an excuse paints a picture of circumstances that could easily repeat themselves, giving your ex no reason to believe that you won’t cheat again.

Seeming half-sorry and describing situations that could easily happen again are hardly the way to win your ex back.

The truth is, you had an opportunity to cheat and you decided to take it. Drunk or sober, you knew that what you were doing was wrong and decided to act first and think later. Now you are in the thinking phase – without your ex – and deeply regret it. You probably hate yourself, wish you could turn back time, are desperate to win your ex back but afraid you never will.

You can get your ex back after cheating but you must understand that excuses are not going to win your ex back.

The key to forgiveness is how you feel about what you have done. To forgive you, your ex needs to believe that you are genuinely and 100% sorry for what you have done. They cannot believe this if you make excuses suggesting that cheating was not entirely your fault.

Own Your Mistake, Take Full Responsibility

You must be completely honest (to yourself as well as your ex) and admit the truth – that there are no excuses. You made an inexcusable mistake and take full responsibility for the terrible hurt you have caused your ex, and are truly suffering for it.

While excuses lack credibility, everyone, your ex included, understands it is possible to make a mistake and how terrible it feels to suffer the consequences of our own stupidity. The more your ex believes that you blame yourself 100%, the more they will be able to believe that you really are suffering, truly remorseful – and unlikely to cheat again.

So, a critical part of how to get your ex back after cheating is to stop focusing on how you can explain (i.e. excuse) what happened. Focus on forming an honest, emotion-based apology that makes it clear to your ex how you feel about what you have done – about the consequences of your own stupidity.

Think too about how your ex feels. It will be difficult to convince your ex that you are sorry for how you have made them feel without also showing that you understand how they feel. Think carefully about this. As well as feeling hurt and betrayed, they will feel angry, insulted, embarrassed, and hit hard in terms of self-esteem.

Taking full responsibility for cheating indicates that you accept the consequences – that you feel they are no more than you deserve. It is far easier to forgive someone who feels this way than it is to forgive someone who dodges responsibility for the way things have turned out.

For more advice, see these 10 tips to get your ex back after cheating.

You can also check out the best ebooks to win an ex back which include in-depth advice on tricky issues like cheating, and show you step-by-step how to win your ex back.

For instance, T Dub Jackson’s Magic of Making Up (review) includes a clean slate method that can be used with another technique in the plan to get a second chance after cheating.

An original No Excuses for Cheating article by Caroline Mackenzie, exclusive to this site!
Copyright © Get-Your-Lover-Back.com